
Weddings are meant to be serious, but who said they couldn’t also be funny? You have come to the right place if you want to tickle some ribs while still hoping for the best. Here is your all-in-one collection of funny wedding wishes, messages, and quotes; it can be for anyone, your daughter or a coworker you barely know but still want to tease. Add a dash of humor and a dash of sarcasm, and you’ve got wedding wishes that they’ll actually remember.
funny wedding wishes & messages
Weddings are all about love, laughter, and a little bit of chaos! If you want to give the happy couple a good chuckle, here are some lighthearted and witty wishes to brighten their big day. Whether you’re writing a card or giving a toast, these funny messages will add some extra joy to their celebration.

- Congrats! Remember, ‘happy wife, happy life’—so just nod and smile!
- Marriage means never having to Google ‘how to be right’—just accept you’re wrong!
- Wishing you a lifetime of love, laughter, and pretending to like each other’s cooking!
- May your love be as endless as your WiFi password arguments!
- Here’s to love, joy, and never winning another argument!
- Marriage: where ‘I do’ quickly turns into ‘Did you take out the trash?
- Congrats! Now you have a permanent teammate for blaming the dog’s mess on!”
- Cheers to love—and to hiding snacks so you don’t have to share!
- May your marriage be as strong as your urge to correct each other!
- Happy wedding day! Don’t worry, the ‘for better or worse’ part is mostly better!
Funny Messages for a Newlywed Couple
If you want to make the newlyweds laugh while celebrating their big day, a funny message is the perfect touch. These lighthearted jokes will remind them that a happy marriage is all about laughter (and pretending to agree with each other), whether you’re signing a card, toasting, or just sending your best wishes.
Here are some hilarious messages to share with the happy couple:
- Congrats! Remember, marriage is all about compromise… mostly you compromising.

- Welcome to wedded bliss—where ‘I love you’ really means ‘Yes, you were right… this time.’
- May your love be as strong as your Wi-Fi signal and your arguments as short as your grocery list!
- Wishing you a lifetime of love, laughter, and selective hearing when needed!
- Marriage tip: Always say ‘You’re right’—it saves hours of debate!
- Here’s to love that never fades… and to hiding the last slice of pizza like a pro!
- Happy wedding day! Don’t worry, the ‘for better or worse’ part is usually better… mostly!
- Marriage is like a walk in the park… if the park had occasional thunderstorms and lost snacks!
- May your biggest fight always be over who loves the other more (but let’s be real, it’ll probably be over the thermostat).
Read more: Best wedding wishes for the newlywed granddaughter and her husband.
funny marriage wishes
Marriage is like a rollercoaster—full of ups, downs, and the occasional urge to scream! But that’s what makes it so fun. A dash of humor will remind them that love is best served with laughter—and maybe a little sarcasm—whether you are celebrating a long-term couple or a newlywed couple.
Here are some rib-tickling marriage wishes to keep the smiles coming:
- Congratulations on becoming legally committed to someone who will now observe all of your bizarre behaviors!
- May your patience be as endless as your Netflix queue and your love be as strong as your coffee!
- Welcome to marriage, where the phrase “I’ll just nap for 5 minutes” becomes a two-hour argument!
- Wishing you a lifetime of love, laughter, and pretending to care about each other’s hobbies!
- Marriage advice: “Yes, dear” settles 90% of disputes. The other 10%? Best of luck!
- Here’s to love that never goes away… and to secretly eating snacks like a ninja in the pantry!
- A happy union! Keep in mind that you are not arguing; rather, you are “passionately discussing”!”
- Cheers to finding someone who tolerates your weirdness 24/7—that’s true love!
- Marriage is basically two people agreeing to share a bathroom forever. Brave souls!
- May your WiFi be strong all the time, your food deliveries be quick, and your arguments be short!
Funny sayings about Marriage
Marriage is like a deck of cards—it starts with hearts and diamonds, but eventually you’re just hoping not to get dealt the clown! Whether you’re a newlywed or a professional, these funny marriage sayings will have you blushing (or crying laughing).
- Marriage is finding that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”
- “The secret to a happy marriage? A short memory… and a long grocery list.”
- “I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always.”
- “Marriage is when a man loses his bachelor’s degree and a woman gets her master’s.”
- “Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener!”
- “We’re happily married—she’s happy, and I’m married.”
- “Marriage means getting to watch someone else click through 200 channels… and still find nothing to watch.”
- “They said, ‘Till death do us part… I didn’t realize that included death by nagging.”
- “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times… always with the same person… because divorce is expensive.”
- “Marriage is the only war where you sleep with the enemy!
Funny Phrases about Weddings
Remember, behind every successful wedding, there is a couple who stopped taking each other seriously…but never stopped laughing together.
Here are some chuckle-worthy observations about weddings:
- Marriage is betting someone half your stuff that you’ll love them forever
- The four magic words for a happy marriage? “You’re right, I’m wrong.
- Getting married is easy—staying married takes long coffee breaks at work
- A good marriage is when the husband understands every word his wife isn’t saying
- They say love is blind—marriage is the corrective lens surgery.
- In marriage, the “I do” eventually becomes “I don’t…care; just pick somewhere to eat.
- Marriage means never having to say you’re sorry…out loud (a mumble counts)
- The secret to our marriage? Separate blankets and separate Netflix accounts
- We have the perfect marriage—she doesn’t expect much, and I don’t deliver much
- Marriage is nature’s way of proving you don’t need sleep to function
Hilarious Love Quotes
Love turns the world on its axis—and occasionally makes you want to jump off! Whether you’re head-over-heels or just rolling your eyes at romance, these laugh-out-loud love quotes hit hilariously close to home.
Here are some sidesplitting truths about love and relationships:
- Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener—especially when you see their weird morning routine
- They say love is giving someone the power to destroy you…which explains why I hide the good snacks
- True love is when someone knows all your flaws…and still hasn’t filed for divorce

- I love you like a fat kid loves cake—which is why we both need to hit the gym
- Love means never having to say you’re sorry…just mouthing “my bad” while scrolling your phone
- The best thing about love? Someone to blame when the remote goes missing
- Romance is dead—it was murdered by “we need to talk” and “did you pay the bills?
Funny Marital Advices
Marriage is like a long road trip—there will be beautiful scenery, a few wrong turns, and at least one argument about the air conditioning. If you want to keep the journey fun (and survive it), here’s some tongue-in-cheek wisdom for wedded bliss.
Here are eight hilarious (but oddly accurate) pieces of marital advice:
- Never go to bed angry—stay up and plot your revenge instead.
- The key to a happy marriage? Separate blankets and a shared hatred of the same people.
- Marriage is 50-50… except when it comes to taking out the trash, then it’s suddenly 100% your job.
- Always agree with your spouse—it saves time, and you’ll lose the argument anyway.
- Pro tip: If you forget an anniversary, just say you were waiting for the right moment to surprise them.
- Marriage is about compromise—like when you want to watch sports, and they want you to move out.
- Keep the spark alive by pretending to listen while mentally planning your next meal.
- Remember: A successful marriage is just two people who refuse to give up… on making each other crazy.
Amusing Wishes & Quotes about Marriage
Marriage is like a comedy show where you bought lifetime tickets—sometimes you’re laughing, sometimes you’re facepalming, but you can’t walk out! The following one-liners will keep the giggles rolling.
Here are 8 fresh and funny takes on weddings:
- Wishing you endless love… and just enough separate hobbies to stay sane!
- Here’s to love that never fades, and to selective hearing that improves with time!
- Marriage: Where ‘for better or worse’ means ‘mostly better… except on laundry day.
- Happy marriage! Remember: You’re not arguing—you’re just passionately agreeing to disagree!
- Cheers to finding someone who laughs at your jokes… or at least pretends to!
- A successful marriage is when ‘I do’ turns into ‘I’ll do it later’… indefinitely.
- Love is sharing your popcorn. Marriage is learning to hide your snacks better.
- May your love story be as epic as your grocery lists… and just as chaotic!
Conclusion
At the end of the day, marriage is about love, teamwork, and finding humor in the little things. These funny wedding wishes are a great way to celebrate the couple’s big day with laughter and joy.
We’ve covered everything from playful jokes to witty one-liners—now you’re all set to spread the cheer! With these lighthearted wishes in your collection, you’ll have the happy couple (and guests) smiling from ear to ear. Here’s to love that grows stronger with every laugh, and to marriages filled with endless joy and just the right amount of hilarious moments. Cheers to the newlyweds! 🥂😄
FAQ’s
What to Write in a Funny Wedding Message? Congrats on finding your permanent plus-one! Wishing you laughter, expert-level fake listening, and peaceful thermostat wars. Remember: happy spouse, happy house (and happy napping!). What's an Amazing Wedding Quote? Marriage isn't perfection - it's apologizing for burnt dinners, laughing when the dog eats the flowers, and still choosing each other after seeing morning hair. The beautiful mess of turning "me" into "we." What to Write in a Funny Wedding Memory Book? Proof you said "I do" to forever compromising on pizza toppings! May this remind you of when his snoring was still "cute" and blanket-hogging seemed "adorable."